1 — Love: Your Life Aim and Purpose
For example, a man who wants to be an international-level basketball player needs to: practise many hours a day, work out intensely, spend money on a good coach and good food, sleep and wake on time, and cut out late nights and alcohol. These decisions become automatic when he is very clear on what he wants.
Contrast this with a person who wants to be an international-level painter. He still needs to practise many hours a day. But does he need intense daily workouts? No. Can he go to parties? Sure. Does he need to sleep and wake on time? Ideally yes, but he can still succeed without this discipline.
Both people are right. Both have different "optimal choices" based on their one love. Knowing your one love makes it very clear what you should say yes and no to.
2 — Forces: Yin and Yang Balance
In life there are two types of things: things that give us energy and things that take energy away. Things that build us up and things that break us down. A yin to the yang.
Some examples of Yin activities: sleep, gentle movement, happy relationships, breathing exercises, good food.
Some examples of Yang activities: vigorous exercise, high-stress work, toxic relationships, polluted environment, junk food.
If we live a healthy life, these forces are kept in constant balance. Too much sleep (yin) means lethargy. Too much exercise (yang) means burnout and injury risk. Neither is better — both must be balanced.
3 — Choices
A practical example: a client is deciding whether to come to their evening training session after a stressful day at work. The Optimal Choice might be attending and training as planned. The Suboptimal Choice might be skipping the session entirely to go straight home and eat comfort food. But there is often a third option a coach can offer that isn't purely "workout or nothing" — a shorter, gentler session focused on breathwork and light movement. Presenting that middle option converts what felt like an all-or-nothing decision into one the client can actually say yes to.
- Optimal Choice — the best available decision for long-term wellbeing and goal achievement.
- Suboptimal Choice — the most pleasurable short-term decision that may cause problems later.
- No Choice — this means you are either sick (mentally or physically) or you genuinely don't know what the right choice is. This is where education from a coach is most valuable.
4 — The Four Doctors
- Dr. Diet — what you consume physically (food and water) and mentally (media, information, and daily conversation).
- Dr. Quiet — sleep, meditation, observation, contemplation, and restorative stillness.
- Dr. Movement — structured exercise and overall daily activity levels.
- Dr. Happiness — your dream, your "one love" — the purpose that makes all the other doctors worth attending to.